I’m angry that I never told you/ the possibility that it may have made a difference has chained itself to my thoughts like a kid on a hunger strike and I am starving to know/ I want the certainty that only you are responsible for how things never flourished/ That if I had said something, things wouldn’t be different/ The ‘If’ always stays/ heavy with the question mark like an upside down fishing hook in my mouth, keeping me above sleep/