I feel like I just came back from a really long vacation
She says
It was like standing outside in a hail storm without cover
And I couldn’t even feel the ice hit my skin
A vacation
But there was no sun
And no relaxing
Just me floating in a fog and ever so often
I’d grasp at a thought
And remember that I wasn’t even supposed to be on vacation
Like I left in the middle of things
Didn’t turn off the stove and now there’s probably a fire
Was pulled away before I got to tell that girl I wouldn’t make it for our date
Was checked out without a choice
Without a warning
Just woke up one morning and the fog in my brain had taken me with no return flight information
So I was just up there
between clouds that weren’t white
Looking at skies that weren’t blue
And in between all that there were sudden lighting bolts that reminded me I was supposed to be somewhere else
but I wasn’t sure where
I heard your voice sometimes
Saw your face
Wanted to fill my mouth with loving words
For you
but they kept slipping from me
I kept forgetting them
I kept slipping into the damn haze
And God I hated this forced “vacation”
And when I was finally back
and I wasn’t sure how long it had been

you were gone.